Monday 23 May 2016

My Short Story

For this piece of writing I have been focusing on my vocabulary and punctuation. I have been learning to:

  • use a large productive vocabulary across the curriculum (Year 9/10)
  • Use a wide range of punctuation appropriately and with increasing accuracy. (Year 9/10)

The pieces of my writing that are highlighted green are where I have shown my vocabulary and punctuation goal

My Story...

Johnny's Big Call Up.

“Beep Beep Beep!” went Johnny’s mission alarm clock. Johnny was hoping he would be able to sleep in because it was a Sunday,but he answered it. It was agent Bob, the leader of S.S.A.( Super Secret Agents), Johnny always wanted to be S.S.A’s Leader so on every mission he gave it his all. Bob told him to head to mission protocol. The 18 year old put on his suit and tie to go with his dress pants because they are what hold all of his super powerful gadgets. He was tall but quite skinny so it was easy to put these on. Johnny went and sat in Mission Protocol where he would be told about what his mission was. Bob strolled into the room and whispered  “your mission is to take out the giant yeti living in Antarctica.”

It was at this moment Johnny knew, he was dead. But, he listened (not really he heard about 10 words) to Bob. He heard one thing it was 10 words long and those 10 words were: um he has a weakness, and it is hot water. Johnny was thinking about how it should be stupid secret agents and not super secret agents and why didn't the FBI deal with it but it was too late now. Johnny sat in the teleporter3000 ready to be teleported to Antarctica where he would face the challenge of his life. 10...9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1...

Johnny was stunned, he slowly gained consciousness and looked up only to find himself randomly standing in the middle of Antarctica. He is frantically shaking because he is so freezing. After taking a look around the area Johnny decides to call Bob and ask which way he needs to go. Bob tells him he needs to go NE because north is worth and east is beast. Johnny slowly walks towards NE He is being extra cautious because he is cold and nervous for when he sees the cave. He grabs out his binoculars and sees the sight that he didn't want to see.

He slowly walks towards the cave when out of nowhere a polar bear yelled “YOU SHALL NOT PASS”.

Johnny grabs out his flamethrower pen and aims it right at the polar bear does a backflip  and dodges it.  Johnny grabs out his sword and exchanges blows with the polar bear. They are both standing there waiting until finally the polar bear goes down and Johnny is able to enter the cave.

Johnny enters the cave and pulls out his torch. Johnny accidentally stands on a rock which awakes the Giant Yeti who comes out of his hiding spot. Johnny is quivering as he realises that the Yeti is 21 feet tall. Johnny slowly pulls out his sword as the Yeti said “suh dude”.

Johnny politely said “suh dude” back. The Yeti smirked and  charged at Johnny...

Johnny quickly dived behind a rock and and gets the water bucket ready to pour on the Yeti.  Johnny splashed the water onto one of the Yeti’s arms. His arm disintegrated into mist. Johnny splashed Water on his other arm and legs, The Yeti was on the ground screaming in pain as Johnny finished him off with Water to the head.

Johnny gets a call from Bob telling him that he is clear to teleported back. Johnny walks out of the teleporter3000 back at the lab only to find all the lights were off. The lights turned on and Johnny looked at the banner that said congratulations you are now the leader of S.S.A. Bob congratulated him as Johnny walked up the the desk to declare their first mission with him in charge.

Ryan

Vocabulary

Punctuation: ellipses


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